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Hey, Psych2Goers. Being in a relationship could be one of the most fulfilling experiences to have.
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Regardless of how things end, they open up parts of ourselves and our hearts that perhaps we didn't dare to explore or didn't think existed.
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But all relationships and feelings have stages that may not be completely mature types of love.
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And of course that's okay. There are many kinds of love.
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Here are some ways to understand if what you're feeling is mature or immature.
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Number one, idealization versus acceptance.
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When you enter a relationship or start liking someone, everything feels new and exciting.
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You love and admire the other person's traits and attributes and find it hard to find faults.
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There's nothing wrong with idealizing your partner or crush. It's a natural and necessary part of being in love.
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But the purpose of love and relationships is to move beyond the idealization phase.
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Both of you are supposed to grow in understanding and acceptance.
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In a mature relationship, you both accept each other's faults while motivating and supporting each other to do and be better.
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Number two, jealousy.
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Many people look down on jealousy in a relationship.
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We think of it as an unattractive trait in ourselves or our partners. But jealousy that is healthy and not obsessive may be an unfulfilled desire.
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In a relationship, these unexpressed desires are not material things.
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They may be emotional needs that you have.
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So, when you find yourself feeling jealous about something in your relationship, figure out what your unfulfilled desire is.
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Once you figured that out, talk to your partner.
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It's best to talk instead of letting your jealousy fester.
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Unresolved jealousy can create destructive patterns or distance.
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Relationships survive when you both communicate.
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Number three, stability.
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A mature relationship needs to be stable.
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Both of you need to be on the same page and share the same goals and intentions.
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During the early stages of a relationship, everything moves fast.
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It feels passionate and dramatic and red flags and boundaries are ignored.
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But at this point, neither of you fully know each other. You just know the best parts of each other.
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As you get to know, understand, and mature in love; the dynamics of the relationship shift.
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As a result, you feel more stable in your love that you share.
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And number four, support.
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Support is one way of showing someone you love them.
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In the early stages of a relationship, the most support many of us can offer is happiness, a promise to be happy around each other.
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As the relationship grows, you both open up to each other, becoming more vulnerable with each other.
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Eventually, you both open up to each other, confiding and supporting one another through difficult times.
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The support and understanding motivate both of you to endure the adversities either of you might face.
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So, do you think your relationship or feelings towards someone are more mature or immature?
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Of course, there's no set formula for a long-lasting relationship.
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As long as you're happy and fulfilled in your relationship, don't stress too much.
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Did you find this video insightful? If so, don't forget to leave a like and a comment about your own experiences, and share this video with a friend if you think it might help them too.
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See you next time!